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Attachment theory/Time for a spiritual checkup!


Today as I was doing my hair I started to talk to God. Many times I feel lonely and confused which always leads me to the front of the prayer line at church. In a way this is a crutch for me and I am tired of it. There is nothing wrong with having other people pray for you, but it’s time that I start praying for myself. I want my own relationship with God. I do not want to kick myself on judgment day when God shows me everything that he desired for me to do in this world, but I didn’t because of ungodly attachments.

We were created by and in the image of God so why is it so hard to let Tyron and them go? God is our ultimate attachment. We were created to be attached to him, he is our first love. When God created Adam, God was the first person he saw and spoke to. There was no Eve, no mamma, daddy or worldly pleasure. Why is it so easy to leave God, but we have a mental break down when it is time to release the people from our past (or present)?

The attachment theory is based in psychology and has been studied by psychologist such as Sigmund Freud and John Bowlby. There are four patterns of attachment that are connected to this theory: secure attachment, avoidant attachment, ambivalent attachment and disorganized-disoriented attachment. As Christians all of us fall into one of these patterns. This is beginning to get a little educational but please read on.  In psychology secure attachment is defined by a child viewing his or her parent as a comfort zone. If a parent were to leave a child who falls into this pattern, the child would become upset and go to the parent upon their return (Feldman, 2011, p. 180). A child who falls under the avoidant attachment pattern avoids his or her parent as if he or she is upset by the parent’s departure (Feldman, 2011, p. 180). In the ambivalent attachment pattern a child displays both positive and negative reactions in the above circumstances. The child is upset when the parent leaves but upon the parents return the child may either kick the parent  or want to be close to them(Feldman, 2011, p. 180). The disorganized- disoriented pattern is applied to children who are inconsistent in behavior. The child will not look at his or her parent when he or she approaches them (Feldman, 2011, p. 180). The rarest form of attachment is the reactive attachment disorder which could be the result of neglect. In this pattern of behavior the child has attachment issues.

Which pattern do you fall under child of God? No one should say the reactive pattern because God said that he would never leave nor forsake you. What are you believing in and if it’s not God, why did you stop trusting him?

I used my text book as a reference for writing this blog

References

Feldman, R. S. (2011). Development across the life span. (6th ed., pp. 179-180). Upper Saddle River, New Jersey: Prentice Hall.

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