Renew and Restore: Trusting God

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeramiah 29:11 ).

I often wonder how it will all happen. God’s plan for my life. How will it come to pass? I’ve been told so many awesome things, but I wonder how it will happen. This process is teaching me to trust God and depend on him instead of my own reasoning. Is this lesson easy? No! I want all of these amazing experiences, but I am challenged to ask myself if I am really ready to take on the assignment that I am called to.

Everything happens for a reason. Even when we don’t understand tough situations and pray that trouble will leave us, we go through so that others can learn from the lessons that God desires to teach us. I have to learn to listen and to spend time with God. I know that I am easily distracted and my purpose requires me to be focused on Him. Everything is about Him. My life, my talent, even my salvation is a gift from the father that He desires to use to bring people to Himself.

I love God. I often wonder why He loves me. I know my thoughts and my ways, but he yet sees beauty in me. Daily I am learning. I am learning to repent. I am learning to read my bible. I am learning to stay away from sin, but sometimes I fail. I am a work in progress and I just desire to be used.

Salvation is a gift from the Lord. It was a gift that I desired when I was a part of the world. I know that God loves me because He choose me. I did not get saved by going to an altar, I simply went to church one New Year’s Eve and I did not leave the way that I entered in that night. Have I messed up? Yes, countless times, but my desire is always Him. God is a promise keeper. He is my consistency and He is my father. He is teaching me to be loved in a functional manner. God will not allow me to sit in dysfunction because it was once my comfort zone. I thought that I deserved to be mistreated because of how I treated people. I used to try to buy people into being my friend although I knew that they didn’t like me. God is teaching me to desire his approval. This is a daily struggle for me because every one wants to be liked right? I am learning that I am not made to fit in. I will make some people uncomfortable and this has protected me from false friendships.

God will use the experiences of others to bless you and inspire you. I get inspired by testimonies and many of my life lessons have come from strangers. God uses strangers to speak into my life. I often think that He will come one way and He shows me that He can use anybody to reveal Himself to me. I’m learning to talk to God as a friend. I can tell him anything. He listens <3

This walk of salvation has had its ups and downs, but I know that God is always near. He is growing my faith and teaching me to depend on Him more than I depend on man. I have been disappointed more times than I care to think about by putting my trust in people.

Blogging has become a blessing because it is therapy for me. I love to write and I desire to share Jesus. He has delivered me and saved me, not only spiritually, but naturally also. There are car accidents that I could have died in and there are sexual encounters that could have gotten me in trouble, but Grace <3

On this journey I have lost some friends. Everyone is not meant to go where God is taking you. I have had to deal with feeling rejected, forgiving people, telling my truth, and not being offended about everything. I pray that God continues to reveal those areas in my life and yours that are not of Him.

God is peace. God wants us to have His peace <3 He is a restorer and He makes things new. He is rich and desires for us to be wealthy, but we must first submit to Him. We have to lay aside our plans and pick up the plan that God has for us. God’s plan for my life blows me away. It is a plan that I cannot make come to pass on my own and I thank Him for His timing because it is perfect.

Every day I am learning to trust God and to seek Him for myself. I desire to pour into the world, but first He must pour into me. It is so important to have a personal relationship with God for your-self. You need that time with Him to sit in His presence and just be His child. Every sentence that I write means nothing if I don’t have Jesus for myself. We all have gifts, but our gifts are meant to glorify the father. How can we preach this awesome God if we neglect our own personal time with Him? Have a desire to seek God for who He is, not just for what He can do for you. Even when God says no, he is still good.

I never understood how important it was to seek God’s face and have an intimate relationship with him until this year to be honest. There is joy in the presence in God. I can be myself with Him flaws and all <3

I pray for a renewed relationship with Christ. I pray to sit at His feet and just admire Him for who He is. I repent for the times that I have neglected you Lord. Help me to acknowledge you daily. In Jesus name, Amen.

Recommended Listening: Crystal Aikin- I Desire More

Comments

It Is Well: Faith Through Trigeminal Neuralgia

“ Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, ‘ My grace is all you need . My power works best in weakness ’ . ‘ So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong ’ ” (2 Corinthians 12:8-10). I can’t tell you how many times I spoke through tears. The tears where not because of emotions, but because of the searing shocks caused by Trigeminal Neuralgia. Trigeminal Neuralgia is a condition that causes intense pain, usually affecting one side of the face. It is a rare disorder that affects less than 1 percent of the population. I happen to be in that 1 percent. The pain from this disorder feels like shocks that are auditioning for a lightning storm show. Th...

Waiting for the Promise vs. Moving in Impatience

“Then Abraham fell on his face and laughed, and said in his heart, “Shall a child be born to a man who is one hundred years old? And shall Sarah, who is ninety years old, bear a child? ” And Abraham said to God, “Oh, that Ishmael might live before You!” Then God said: “No, Sarah your wife shall bear you a son, and you shall call his name Isaac; I will establish My covenant with him for an everlasting covenant, and with his descendants after him” ( Genesis 17: 17-19 NKJV). Isaac was desired, but Ismael was birthed out of impatience. If God told you that you were going to birth something beautiful, no matter what your season may look like, bank on the Lord’s promises. Your Ishmael does not have to be a man, your Ishmael can be an opportunity. Don’t walk into just any ole thing because you got tired of waiting on God. If God promised you something in 2016 and you didn’t see it in 2017, that does not mean that He forgot about what He promised you. Isaac had a set season and ...

You are Not Lost in the Crowd. God Sees You!

Someone asked the question Why do we sing? When we lift our hands to Jesus What do we really mean ~Kirk Franklin “Why we sing?” It’s very very easy to get lost in the realm of religion or to get caught up in the hype of “church”. God has blessed so many of his people with gifts and talents that range from writing and composing, to worshiping, preaching and dancing. At my church, it seems like every one has some sort of gift and I must admit that I feel lost in the shuffle, but that brings me to point of asking myself questions such as ,“who am I going to church for?” and “whose attention am I aiming for?” Everyone wants to be noticed. We want to be praised and we want to be the favorite child, but at what cost? What are we paying to be number one in the congregation’s eyes? and do we even care if God is pleased with us right where we are? I’m the queen of being offended and I often compare myself, my progression in Christ, and my life to others. This should not be so and...

Destroying Idols

“For thou shalt worship no other god: for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God” (Exodus 34:15 KJV). As I was up late watching videos of people talking about the personal lives of celebrities, I thought about the fact that it is crazy to worship those people. I thought about the fact that we actually worship flesh and I thought about the fact that we will all die someday. There have been extremely talented individuals that have passed away and their talent went with them. These individuals were considered to be iconic and they were worshiped because of it. Theses celebrities had gifts that were not known to be used for the One that gave it to them. These people had beautiful things and they had gatherings where people called out their names and raised their hands in worship to them, but what about God? Isn’t God the giver of the gifts and isn’t God the one who allows people to live lavishly? What about the worship that belongs to Him? Are we as humans so selfish, t...

Walk on Water Faith

Becoming great takes faith. Peter did not become great in the twinkle of an eye. He had to go through things. This same man who stood up boldly to tell people about the Holy Spirit also once denied Jesus. We have to be so prayed up in Christ because we don’t always know what our flesh or our circumstances will cause us to do. The struggle to greatness gets real! David had to fight many battles not only in the world, but in the kingdom of God because he was called to greatness. David wrote many psalms documenting his trails and successes. He was a man after God’s own heart, but yet he was not perfect. We go through things that help sustain us in this life and we can’t remain discouraged by the hurts that the world throws at us. I admire the bravery of the apostles because I don’t know how well I would have done emotionally if whole systems were coming against me. These men were beat, lied on, and put in prison because of the Christ that they were representing. People will ...

Shrinking Is Not an Option

Today I realized that I was afraid of success. I’m afraid of being all that God has called me to be because I am afraid of the accountability that it will intel and I feel undeserving of all that He has for me. I feel like 2019 is a time to grow forward and to excel. It’s like we are knocking on the door of the promises of God after spending so long in a wilderness. The thing about being in a wilderness is that that place is meant to make you a warrior, not a weak-minded victim. You are supposed to learn how to fight and encourage yourself in the wilderness, but some of us have become content with the dryness of the land instead. Today, I wanted to shrink because so much seems possible for me right now. Things that I have been working for are right in face, but a part of me wants to just shrink because I am comfortable. I became comfortable with fighting and with the thoughts of giving of up. I became friends with being disappointed, but now God is wanting to call fo...

Take Up Your Cross

God paved the way for my present and my future with the prayers that He placed into my heart many years ago. I didn’t know what new challenges I would have to overcome or what would be required of me as I uttered the sentiments of my heart into His ears. All I knew was that I wanted to serve Him. One my many heart’s desires was to not be a seat filler. I didn’t want to grow content with occupying a seat in the church and never getting out of it to go into all the world to do what God had ordained for me to do in the earth. At that time I didn’t know who God had called me to be and I didn’t understand that some of my prayers was an indication of it. Spoken from a transparent place, as life happened, the more God told me to get up the more I wanted to sit down. Tiredness and fear had gripped me on more occasions than I want to admit and I have had the audacity to whisper, “ get somebody else to do it”, on more than one occasion. I felt justified in what I...

The Heart Matters

Nobody gets into a relationship ready to support someone as they go through a heart transplant. Boyfriend and girlfriend titles have no vows. You’re in it for as long as it lasts and hopefully it leads to more; but what if something changes? What if your attraction to that person did not change, but how you are attracted to them did? Suppose you wanted to love them differently then you did before? Suppose your heart changed and theirs did not? Whenever I emotionally opened up to a guy (pre Jesus),we went together, period. There were no ifs, ands,or buts, we were a couple. I didn’t understand the importance of protecting who I would become because I never wanted to become anything independently from someone else, if that makes since. I allowed myself to waste years on 2 separate occasions , but the last time was different. In that season, God was in motion and I fought it for a while. I got to a place where I wanted God and he did not. My heart changed and he remained the sa...

Your Response to the Desert will Determine How long You Stay There part 2: Shut up and Let God move

Being quiet does not mean that one i s weak, it can merely mean that that individual is wise. There are some things and some people that deserve no reply. We have to make th e daily choice to either ar gue our way through life's situat ions or pray our way through it. Know the difference between praying your way out and praying your way through something. Some seasons and environments are meant to grow you. It may feel as if your dying, but you may merely be sweating out the impurities. Hot environments are uncomfortable, but the cactus has everything that it needs to survive in the desert. You have to depend on the water source that you have on the inside of you that no one else may be able to see. Don't look at the time clock waiting for God to move you because you hate where you are placed on assignment for Him. Instead, look at that same time clock and ask Him when it's time to move on H is behalf where H e has placed you. Be the change agent tha...

Heart Inspection: Clean Your House

I remember growing up in a place that required inspections. I used to hate them because I knew that my mom and I would be up all night making sure that the house was clean. I understood that everything had to be just right before the apartment manager came in to make sure that things were how they needed to be, so I got to cleaning. I had two methods of cleaning depending on my mood. I had a lazy way of making everything appear spotless and I had a thorough way of cleaning that I learned from my father and grandmother. When I was in my lazy mood, I just stuffed everything into closets and under the bed because I knew that no one would look there. It produced great results and we passed the inspections. When I cleaned the way that I observed my father cleaning, I would make sure that everything was how it needed to be. I eventually began to dislike things under the bed and I got into the habit of cleaning out my closet. These results also produced great outcomes that I didn’t ha...

JaNina B.

Search This Blog