The Heart Matters

Nobody gets into a relationship ready to support someone as they go through a heart transplant. Boyfriend and girlfriend titles have no vows. You’re in it for as long as it lasts and hopefully it leads to more; but what if something changes? What if your attraction to that person did not change, but how you are attracted to them did? Suppose you wanted to love them differently then you did before? Suppose your heart changed and theirs did not?
Whenever I emotionally opened up to a guy (pre Jesus),we went together, period. There were no ifs, ands,or buts, we were a couple. I didn’t understand the importance of protecting who I would become because I never wanted to become anything independently from someone else, if that makes since. I allowed myself to waste years on 2 separate occasions , but the last time was different. In that season, God was in motion and I fought it for a while. I got to a place where I wanted God and he did not. My heart changed and he remained the same.
“Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert” (Isaiah 43:19).
If you have ever been in surgery, you know that you can’t fight anesthesia. You have no choice but to go with the flow of that medication. My process, at the time, was one that I had to flow with. My flesh still craved things that my heart no longer wanted. I had a heart transplant.
I had to learn that no matter how bad you may want to, you cannot change the heart of another person to match the new heart that you receive from Jesus. You get to a place where a choice has to made. A fight happens between your flesh and the Spirit; the new and the old. You have to choose to grow or remain stagnant and unproductive. I’m no where near perfect, but I’m also not as fragmented as I used to be. I was comfortably broken. I knew that I needed a change and God provided for me in that place.
“Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me” (Psalm 51:10).
A heart transplant is a necessary part of growth and some old things have to go out with that old heart.
“Come now, and let us reason together,” Says the LORD, “Though your sins are like scarlet, They shall be as white as snow; Though they are red like crimson, They shall be as wool”. ( Isaiah 1:18).
God was putting people and places in my path in order to shift my heart towards His and for a while, I resisted. I wanted to hang on to my comfort zone, but God had other plans for my life. I allowed myself to become content with scrapes when God wanted to give me a large portion. I was wounded, but I was also afraid to be healed.
On my walk with Jesus, I have learned who He is to me. As you walk with Jesus, you will learn who He is you. The hard seasons made me who I am at this moment. God guarded me, listened to me, spoke to me, comforted me, and loved me through my process.
When you are confronted with the opportunity to receive a new heart, I get that it can be hard to let go of the past and I get that it can be difficult to let go of the pain that you have grown to call comfort, but your new is at stake. Your new beginning, your clean slate, your vision and your future is on line. Consider this,is holding on to what hinders you worth allowing your destiny to waste away? Allow God to do what He desires to do in your heart even when you don’t understand. Trust the process and know that your ending will be a good one.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart,and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths” ( Psalm 3:5-6).
“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end” (Jeremiah 29:11.

Lord, In Jesus name, I pray to not fight my own healing. I pray to be focused on you and to not allow distractions to keep me from the call that you have placed on my life. Lord, I pray for a clean heart. I pray to be a woman who is a faithful repenter. Lord, I thank you that I am not who I used to be. I thank you that you never changed even when I revisited my sins. I thank you for this journey in you and I am grateful Lord. Please continue the work that you are doing in me. In Jesus name I pray, amen.

Comments

You are Seen

“Thereafter, Hagar used another name to refer to the LORD, who had spoken to her. She said, ‘You are the God who sees me.’ ” (Genesis 16:13) Hagar was unexpected. She was an Egyptian maid who turned into a baby mama, given to a man so that his wife could bear a son before her time of blessing had come. and she was a track star. My girl was a track star too. She got out of the house of Abram so fast when she became mistreated. Hagar never asked to be placed in the position to become a wife while still being called a maid. Her yes impacted her greatly and a ‘beef’ was the result. Hagar knew the house rules, “We serve the big G and not the little g’s over here.” She saw Abram praying and observed him meeting with God, but then it happened. Sari commissioned her, and she was given to a man. Hager was never really asked, she was never really considered a wife and was more lik...

You are Not Lost in the Crowd. God Sees You!

Someone asked the question Why do we sing? When we lift our hands to Jesus What do we really mean ~Kirk Franklin “Why we sing?” It’s very very easy to get lost in the realm of religion or to get caught up in the hype of “church”. God has blessed so many of his people with gifts and talents that range from writing and composing, to worshiping, preaching and dancing. At my church, it seems like every one has some sort of gift and I must admit that I feel lost in the shuffle, but that brings me to point of asking myself questions such as ,“who am I going to church for?” and “whose attention am I aiming for?” Everyone wants to be noticed. We want to be praised and we want to be the favorite child, but at what cost? What are we paying to be number one in the congregation’s eyes? and do we even care if God is pleased with us right where we are? I’m the queen of being offended and I often compare myself, my progression in Christ, and my life to others. This should not be so and...

Be Still and Know

“Be still, and know that I am God”- Psalm 46:10a KJV Today as I was driving to work, anxious, knowing that I needed Jesus, I saw “In God I trust”, and “ Be still and know” on two separate cars, one after the other. I needed both things, and that is what I am clinging to. The past can make you feel as if you are in a track meet running from it. It seems faster and more advance within the race, but God says, “Be still and know that I am God.” Being still in a world full of thoughts is its own task, but the command of God is bigger than that. “Jesus answered and said unto him, If a man love me, he will keep my words.” -John 14:23a Above anything, God’s word is the answer. It is what halts the past and brings stillness instead of constant worrying. I considered Moses today. This man, who literally ran from his past, was asked to lead others to a future that God...

Gut Check of the Heart

“But [like a boxer] I strictly discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached [the gospel] to others, I myself will not somehow be disqualified [as unfit for service]” (1 Corinthians 9:27 AMP). If you need to be told that you did a good job, “You did a good job. You gave, and you submitted to man. You showed up and did what they asked. Good job.” “But I have this [charge] against you, that you have left your first love [you have lost the depth of love that you first had for Me]” (Revelation 2:4 AMP). Gut Check: Don’t love the applause of men more than you love God. Why do you show up? What do you gain from that, and what happens when the way that they applaud you does not meet your need of this kind of fulfillment? Beat your body into submission to God. Serve Him well. Become an early riser and seek the Father to release the strategy for the day to you. Sit in His presence and bask in His love. Thank Him for what He has a...

Who Are You Married To?

“Jesus said to her, “Go, call your husband, and come here.” The woman answered and said, “I have no husband.” Jesus said to her, “You have well said, ‘I have no husband,’ for you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; in that you spoke truly” (John 4:17-18 NKJV). Over the last few days, I’ve missed someone. You may wonder why I would even start things off in this way, but this type of stuff has to be confronted because it’s how people get caught up and entangled in what God loosed them from already. As I was thinking what I was thinking, each time I heard, “What part of toxic do you miss?” I can’t argue with the question. The situation was beyond toxic, but with this being so, what causes me to miss something that left me so shattered? The answer: the familiarity. Being familiar with a thing will cause you to run ...

The Process of Faithing It: Trusting Jesus with Your Faith

“Daughter, your faith has made you well. Go in peace, and be healed of your affliction” (Mark 5:34 NKJV). Can you imagine Jesus in a crowd? Everyone has a need, but His target in that moment is to go and build the faith of a little girl’s family at the request of her father because they think that she will die. The father is scared, but Jesus was on the way until He felt something. This feeling was different, but powerful. Jesus turns around looking, asking questions, but finds his answer in the form of a woman, standing and looking amazed at what just happened to her. After 13 years of anemia, tiredness, dizzy spells, soiled clothing, and impacted relationships, she is healed. This woman with an issue of blood had spent all of her money, but decided to trust Jesus with her faith, which was all that she had left. Jesus was not too busy to stop and ask, “Who touched me?”. The disciples reminded Jesus of all the people that were around them, but this touch was different. Some...

Keep Your Lamp Filled

“Then the kingdom of heaven shall be likened to ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom. Now five of them were wise, and five were foolish. Those who were foolish took their lamps and took no oil with them, but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps. But while the bridegroom was delayed, they all slumbered and slept” (Matthew 25:1–5). Everyone had the same mindset to go to the same place for the same reason. Everyone was on their way, but partial action was taken by five of the virgins. The bridegroom had the capacity to care for all ten. Everyone had a lamp, but everyone did not have oil to see Who they were waiting for. The oil was available, but five virgins did not take the initiative to get more oil. What they had was not enough for the journey they were on. Five of the virgins were wise; they did what was needed to obtain more oil. The other five virgins were foolish, thinking that what they had was enough and that getting...

I have Chosen You: Distractions and Distress are not Your Portion

“You did not choose me, but I choose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, He may give it to you.” (John 15:16 ESV). At the church that I attend, the stage/ alter has steps that one can ascend on to reach the top. As I looked at the steps, I envisioned what God is doing in this season. I saw a representative on the floor before the steps began , and I saw them moving up one step at a time. We are in a season of elevation and with elevation comes great responsibility. As I consider the prayers that I have prayed and the questions that I have asked God , I see the answers all around me, but inwardly I have rejected the responsibility that comes ...

Need Prayer?

“But I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail” (Luke 22:32a). For a time, I didn’t ask people for prayer . I became protective of ‘my stuff,’ and I backed away from needing people because I had me-the army of one. I felt alone, misunderstood; all the things that I wanted no one to know about because I got me . This mindset created offense and functional depression. I backed away so that no one would see it; no one knew me enough to recognize what it looked like. “Simon, Simon, behold, Satan demanded to have you, that he might sift you like wheat” (Luke 22:32b). What does it look like when you are being sifted? The sifting starts early in life and can be a continuous pattern if the devil feels like his tactics are working against you. I asked a friend recently, “Why am I so emotional? Did God give me these emotions?” I tend to feel deeply because I am an intercessor, but the emotions have to be stewarded properly. You have to master them by submit...

The Importance of Knowing How to Pray

No matter what mental state you are in, where you are in life, or who you have around you, prayer will always be the heartbeat of your survival. You need to know how to pray during both the mountain top experiences and the valley experiences. If no one ever taught me anything, I learned how to express myself to God through prayer. Prayer isn’t always about asking God for things, but you can actually sit with Him and tell Him how you feel. There have been moments in my life where I felt like the Lord was the only one that I could talk to about what was going on in my life. You have to get into a place where you begin to communicate with God as you would with anyone else. There are times when I speak out loud to God because I know that He is around me. God’s presence is peace, it changes the atmosphere, and it will shift your entire mood. Once you’ve talked to the Father, you know that everything will be ok just because He is around you. I pray that for anyone that needs it. I p...

JaNina B.

Search This Blog